Waste of Space

I lvobe you. See you tomnoerrpw... Yea. right.
I hate that. I really hate that right now im at home, listening to depressing music, while your drunk off your ass with your two best friends. I hate that your the one limiting me. Keeping me from making friends. Keeping me from enjoying other people. Making it harder harder to be from you. I hate that as i wright this, im bawling like a baby. I hate that i cant even summon the courage to ask someone to hang out on my day alone, and that im hiding from my sister so i can write this. I hate that no one in my family understands that im so lonely, and that i love them, they just dont give me what i need sometimes. That i need someone else.. I hate that i hurt them constantly. I just cant begin to convey to them how i feel. I dont know how. I feel so alone all the time. I feel that people just dont want anything to do with me. Its not that they dont like me, or that im a dick. People just dont think im fun, or enjoyable. Its so hard to walk at school, and see all the friendly faces, and know that they really dont care. They just respect me. They just walk by, and dont look back. Not even the girl who says she loves me. I feel like she doesnt understand the important parts of me. I feel like she just thinks things are perfect, and couldnt be better, but i wish that things were different. I wish that i had a life, that i had dreams, that i had aspirations. But i dont. And i dont know why. I dont know why i dont care about myself, and where im going to be in a few years. I hate myself. So much. I feel like i have done nothing, that im nothing. That i have no purpose, and wont have one. Im just going to end up wasting space like so many other wastes on the planet. I have no drive to do anything. I have no pride in myself. I just feel alone.

Alone
at last the crowd cheers
I take my step forward,
and see the light

Its bright in my face
I can hardly see the thousand face-less faces
all looking back at me
blank

Useless
thats what we are
these face-less faces
and I

They raise their glasses
the swing down there drink and cheer
cheer for the pointlessness of our now shared destiny
because thats what i am now.

Just a face-less face
alone